When we use the term arousal curve, we are speaking to where you are in terms of feeling turned on. No two people have the same arousal curve, it is different for every person. The curve is a scale from 1- 10. 1 is very little arousal, 9 is the point of no return (orgasm). Some people can take a very long or very short time to go up the arousal curve. The area between 6 and 8 is known as the sweet spot. This is where your body is highly aroused, feeling the pulsing and undulating of being turned on, yet not quite at orgasm. Most women have lots of experience surfing the sweet spot, whereas men often move more quickly to the 9 on arousal and miss the whole experience of feeling the arousal move up and down the curve. To learn more about the up’s and down’s, read our post From Awkward Moments to Enjoying the Up’s and Downs.
If you want to experience more levels of your arousal curve, lay down or sit in a comfortable position where you will have at least 15 minutes of private to explore your body. Close your eyes and begin to breathe. Often people are breathing very shallow, allow yourself to breathe down into your body. Take a moment to notice, if you had to rate yourself on a scale from 1-10 of arousal, where would you put yourself right now in this very moment. Then begin to touch your body, including genitals if your body is ready. In a minute or so, check in with yourself again where you feel you are on the arousal curve.
Continue like this till you feel your body moving up to an 8 or so. When you get to the 8 on your arousal, see what it would be like to accept and allow, or even desire your body to move down the arousal curve. This might be your first time moving down the arousal curve and surfing the sweet spot. It might take a little while to get there. Continue throughout this process, to ask yourself, where am I right now in this moment? NOT where do I want to be or where do I think I should be? If the timing is right and you feel interested in moving to the 9, allow your body to move up the curve on its own time. Paying attention to all the changes that you feel as you move towards orgasm.
Further reading: The Importance of Breathing During Sex – How To Tune Into Your Body