Pleasure from Pain: Endorphin “Highs” and the Subspace

When you are being restrained (by choice) in a sexual situation, you may, paradoxically, experience a greater sense of freedom. Freedom to stop overanalyzing, freedom from responsibility in the situation, freedom to receive. You are vulnerable to the possibilities that your partner is in control of, which can create an “erotic anxiety” that heightens the sensations. Surrendering sexual control…

Cheating Wives: What’s Up With the Cuckold Fantasy?

You may be surprised to learn that a lot of men (and a few women) have a sexual fantasy where their partner is having sex with someone else. It usually goes like this: their partner is being fucked by someone else and they are either watching or otherwise unable to physically participate in the scene. This…

Helmut Newton’s Sexy B&W Photos

I love the sexy black and white photographs in Helmut Newton‘s book, SUMO. Over his lifetime, the late German photographer did many covers and spreads for magazines, and SUMO is a compilation of many of the most popular images. The two-part photos were something he was known for, because you never knew what might change or…

Rope, Bondage, & Dominance Classes From Midori

Midori, 2013 Best Sex Educator winner of SF Weekly, is a sexuality educator, artist, and author that teaches practical classes on the art of rope tying, bondage, and dominance. She travels around the world teaching; her upcoming schedule includes classes in Boston, New York City, Washington D.C., Houston, San Francisco, and London. You can also see…

Cockfidence

Men today get conflicting messages from women and society about how they are supposed to express their masculinity emotionally, spiritually, physically, and sexually. It can be frustrating on more than one level, and guys are often left hiding some part of themselves in order to feel like they can function. Cockfidence, by Celeste Hirschman and…

BDSM Basics

“We are hierarchical animals. Sweep one hierarchy away, and another will take its place, perhaps less palatable than the first. There are hierarchies in nature and alternate hierarchies in society. In nature, brute force is the law, a survival of the fittest. In society, there are protections for the weak. Society is our frail barrier…