What (Most) Women Want

As much as things have changed socially between men and women over the last several decades, there’s some things that show no sign of changing! Yup, attraction is not politically correct. As much as people want gender equality, they still expect a man to be responsible for what’s going on in his home. The following is an excerpt from Being…

Pleasure from Pain: Endorphin “Highs” and the Subspace

When you are being restrained (by choice) in a sexual situation, you may, paradoxically, experience a greater sense of freedom. Freedom to stop overanalyzing, freedom from responsibility in the situation, freedom to receive. You are vulnerable to the possibilities that your partner is in control of, which can create an “erotic anxiety” that heightens the sensations. Surrendering sexual control…

How To Give A Rim Job

Aline Et Valcour by Hans Bellmer, 20th c. German artist Rim jobs aka analingus, are an “I love it!” or “no-way!” sort of thing. The sensations are unique, and for those who enjoy them there is nothing else quite like it. This is because there are tons of nerve endings around the anus. Not many people get…

All About Prostate Pleasure

In this set of videos, Chris from Pleasure Mechanics interviews Aislinn Emirzian, co-author of The Ultimate Guide to Prostate Pleasure, about what the prostate is and how men can receive pleasure from prostate massage. What is the prostate? In the image below you can see that the prostate is about the size of a walnut…

Nice Guys Don’t Finish Last When They Speak Up

I hear it quite a bit in my practice, “He is really nice, I like talking to him, but I don’t want to fuck him.” How do you find the balance between being a nice person, and being a fuckable person; how do you cross the bridge from being someone women are not interested in…

From Jealousy To Joy: An Anecdote Of Extremes

Guest post from Lady Jane For many of us “monogam-ish” folks, wrangling jealousy is one of the most difficult parts of our relationships and is a common recurring theme. It’s the realization that if you have multiple partners in your life, you’re going to have to learn to share. “Learn to share” is a tricky…

Rope, Bondage, & Dominance Classes From Midori

Midori, 2013 Best Sex Educator winner of SF Weekly, is a sexuality educator, artist, and author that teaches practical classes on the art of rope tying, bondage, and dominance. She travels around the world teaching; her upcoming schedule includes classes in Boston, New York City, Washington D.C., Houston, San Francisco, and London. You can also see…

Kegels: You’re Doing It Wrong!

Image © Futurama Who knew weighted balls weren’t the way to go? According to Julia Di Paolo, a registered pelvic-floor physiotherapist interviewed in a recent article by Devon Murphy in Vice, “holding balls in the vagina is not the way the vagina works.” She teaches 13 different types of Kegels but says sex is the best…

Good In Bed

If you’re into sex, self-improvement, and reading, check out Good in Bed, a site offering inexpensive eBooks addressing a variety of sexual and related health issues as well as advice and ways to improve on what’s already working. From their site, “According to CNN, over 40 million Americans are stuck in a sex rut and more…

Friend Zones & What To Do About Them

There are moments where attempting to date a certain person can feel like a game of snakes and ladders; at seemingly random intervals you feel like you’re getting a lucky break and other times you feel like you’re getting your ass kicked back to the curb. You may wonder at what point you should throw…

How To Introduce Sex Toys Into The Bedroom

Introducing new activities and changing things up in the bedroom can be fun, invigorating, and also a little scary. A lot of people find it hard to ask for what they want, for example, “I want a vibrator in our bed.” There can also be a fear that your partner thinks that what you’ve been…

Erotic Massage – Video Instruction On Touch And Sex

The New School Of Erotic Touch offers a variety of instructional video classes that teach viewers how to deliver erotic massage as well as become a better and more mindful lover with different sexual techniques. One of their classes, Kama Sutra of Sexual Positions and the Fine Art of Sexual Positions, stood out to us. This…

The New School Of Erotic Touch

The New School of Erotic Touch is a wonderful resource for anyone looking to improve their sex life with new ideas and techniques. Their site offers a wide variety of instruction, including erotic massage for men and women, sensual techniques for oral, anal, and vaginal sex, tantra, and masturbation. The typical cost of a video…

Butt Plugs – Possibly The Best Sex Toy Out There

I believe butt plugs are some of the best sex toys out there. If you are feeling a little bored (or a lot bored) with the pleasure you have been receiving, either through masturbation or partner sex, I highly recommend throwing a butt plug in the mix. “What’s so great about a butt plug,” you…

It’s Over, Now What?

Image © Michal Marcol at FreeDigitalPhotos I remember my first heartbreak. The pain. The excruciating, can’t eat, can’t sleep horrible feeling of ending. I don’t “remember it like it was yesterday,” yet I can say the feeling, the pain, and the heartbreaking experience will always be with me. When we are in love, scientists say…

Cum Stain Removal – How To Clean Up After Sex

Not trying to freak you out with the title! But for one reason or another, almost all of us have experienced a sexual play time that accidentally ended with cum, blood, or some other body fluid on the bed. Cum stains: Some guys have Spiderman cum that seems to go everywhere. Sometimes it can feel…

Asking For What You Want In Relationships

Many people in relationships twist and contort themselves around their partner and forget about the things that they want. Often this happens right in the beginning of a relationship, called the merging phase. Once the merging phase ends, the things you want that are different from your partner begin to show up more frequently. Asking…

Eating Out – A Beginner’s Guide To Cunnilingus

The vulva can be a bit mysterious sometimes, even when you’re well acquainted with someone’s. One important thing to remember as you decide to head south is every woman will feel different about being eaten out. Some will love it; they will beg and plead for you to lick their pussies, some will actually require…

Blow Jobs – How To Give A Happy Ending

Fellatio… Welcome to our straightforward guide to giving great blow jobs. No accessories needed. First things first, no need to hurry (lay off the speed!!. Many people get hell-bent on getting that cock to shoot cum out as quickly as possible. We want to teach you how to give great pleasure, not just get someone…

Parents – When Your Teen Is Sexually Active

As a follow-up to our other post on talking to your teen about sex, we wanted to offer some advice to parents about how to talk with their teen who already is sexually active or is contemplating becoming sexually active in the near future. So many teens are sexually active – 7 out of 10…

Sex Talk – Talking To Your Teenager About Sex

Image © Phil Spratt As the cartoon above illustrates, because of technology young people are more exposed to sex than ever before. But are they more knowledgeable? Yes and no. While teenagers are watching lots of porn, they are receiving few alternative perspectives about what a consensual, constructive and fulfilling sexual relationship looks like. Whether…

Consent And Boundaries

One of my professors, a very wise woman that lectured on sexuality, said: “When it comes to sex, wait for the yes please!” As a somewhat sexually inexperienced sophomore in University, I was wondering what that kind of consent looked like. At 27 years old and married, I now understand; yes please is uninhibited enthusiasm.…

How to Practice Safer Sex

Safer Sex is not called Safe Sex because there are no guarantees of sex being risk-free from STDs and other unintended consequences that can result in emotional pain or unplanned pregnancy. There are some general guidelines that reduce these risks, such as using condoms or engaging in sexual play but not intercourse, which will be…

BDSM Basics – A Beginner’s Guide

We are hierarchical animals. Sweep one hierarchy away, and another will take its place, perhaps less palatable than the first. There are hierarchies in nature and alternate hierarchies in society. In nature, brute force is the law, a survival of the fittest. In society, there are protections for the weak. Society is our frail barrier…

Mating in Captivity – How to Balance Desire and Love

In her TED talk above, Esther Perel argues good and committed sex draws on two conflicting needs: our need for security and our need for surprise. In her book, Mating in Captivity, she discusses when we are most drawn to our partners and why, our turn-ons and offs, balancing love and desire, reconciling domesticity and sensuality, and how to give…